Blame and Understanding

Speaking for myself, keeping in mind I can’t think of a single person this doesn’t apply to; human nature feeds on blame. “It wasn’t my fault” – my childhood sucked, my family let me down,  I’m mad as hell. No one understands me, it wasn’t supposed to be this way, or, how dare you question my life. We act like petulant idiots, believing we’re justified – because we blame.

Blame is second nature; judgement  our hammer. It’s always someone else at fault – “you cheated”, “you lied”,  ” you were wrong”, blame is simpler than understanding. Fueled by impossible expectation, woven into the fabric of human nature by storybook cut outs of  how we’re supposed to behave. Blame rears its ugly head when mothers, fathers, sisters, and brothers dare to be human – all before we start our own lives. As young adults we try to be perfect cut-outs, blaming our failures on circumstance. We pigeon hole those around us to fit roles prescribed by society – then cast blame when it blows up in our face. Nothing is really our fault, someone else is always to blame. Never crossing our mind to understand we’re all human.

I suspect that if we were able to cut those around us some slack, we would naturally approach life with understanding. We have such a short amount of time; why waste it on blame?  Blame, finger pointing, and exclusion are knee jerk reactions leading to bitterness and regret. Life is short – understanding we’re all humans  doing the best we can, might  be the ticket to a worthwhile show.

Ponder the cost of allowing blame to eat you alive – maybe then you’ll find some understanding. Mistakes are human, and life has so much more to offer once blame is laid to rest.

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3 thoughts on “Blame and Understanding

  1. You’ve heard to the finger pointing hand: one finger points at someone and three point at yourself. More to the point, I heard this great definition of the word ‘responsibility’: The Ability to Respond. The capacity to get of your butt and do something about it. Blame is another word for lack of responsibility. That is OK too – we don’t have to fix the whole world, just not whinge about it. I think.

  2. It always amazes me that people seem to feel better about themselves when they can talk down about someone else, or blame them for what has gone wrong. I wonder sometimes how it is that we have raised generations of people so insecure that they are afraid to take responsibility for their own actions…. though truth be told the things done/decisions made drunk, or stoned are rarely things anyone wants to take credit for, so blaming someone else is comforting.

    Dunno… is it just blame? Or do we have a need to feel there’s something/someone bigger’n us? Are we really blaming others, or are we searching for the Great Unifier that would make sense out of a sometimes senseless world?

    Cheers,
    Peter
    A retired Photographer looks at life
    Life Unscripted

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