Suck You Bedroom Widow

I need my head examined. The first few arachnid invaders were greeted with  less alarm than interest. Black Widow spiders weren’t supposed to live in Vancouver – at least that’s what I believed. A little research tore that notion to shreds – the first couple I caught and released, the next few – admittedly stomped in defensive annoyance. Convincing myself these were isolated incidences  contained within the walls of our basement laundry room – it went on the “to do” list with best intentions.

A few months later “kitchen widow” showed herself. This wasn’t good. I meant to address my escalating spider problem, several attempts to catch kitchen widow failed. After a while I got used to her – she was predictable, never strayed from her window plot – at least I knew where she was.

Tonight something fell behind the dresser in my bedroom. Flat on the floor, flashlight in hand – a spot light shone on “bedroom widow”. Unlike the prior spinsters, I swear she looked at me and said “I dare you”. Twice as big, her massive, bulbous belly taunting my next move with unflinching bravado.

I don’t think so bedroom widow. Cunning stealth consumed my every breath as I tippy toed for the vacuum cleaner. Slow motion determination guided my belly to the floor – flashlight in one hand, vacuum hose in the other. SUCK YOU BEDROOM WIDOW.


Mature female western black widow spider, Latrodectus hesperus.

Photo by Rick S. Vetter.



9 thoughts on “Suck You Bedroom Widow

    • Australia has far nastier creepy crawlies – no argument there.Black Widows are timid and tend to stay put but it would be far from harmless if unlucky enough to reach behind something and bitten. The bite is rarely fatal but can “melt” considerable tissue.:)

  1. Please do me a favor and keep them little buggers up there. Haven’t seen any here, yet, and would be very happy never to change that status.

    On a more deadly note we did have an infestation of field mice when we arrived and we cured that with a few doses of something called One Bite — with obvious implications. However, in our efforts to STAY mousey free I periodically place a 2 oz chunk of that stuff in a spot I considered inaccessible to birds and other critters we’d rather not be poisoning until a couple days ago…

    I went out to the car and on the way home I noticed that my bait hiding place was empty. Completely empty. Now there’s no little field mouse I know of that’s going to eat an entire 2 oz chunk. But it was gone. Look around. High and Low. Nothing. Expand my search. Find most of 2 oz block of bait about 40′ away from RV….

    Am now wondering what it was that drug that bait that far….


    We’re not alone…….


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