Flat Earth

Allow me to introduce bat shit – AKA, the Flat Earth Society. Lunacy dictates the Earth is flat, a disc with the arctic circle at center. Antarctica a 150 foot high ring wall guarded by NASA employees. stationed to prevent the curious from climbing, hence falling off edges of the disc. The Sun and Moon are spheres measuring 32 miles across, moving in circles 3,000 miles above the plane of Earth. Stars follow at a distance of 3,100 miles, acting as “spotlights” to illuminate different areas in a 24 hour cycle.

Flat-Earthers believe images beyond Earth’s disc are Photoshopped. Conspiracy dictates fabrication of Moon landings, elaborate staging of space missions and GPS that tricks pilots into thinking they’re flying straight lines around a sphere when in reality they fly in circles.

Based on a theory called the Zetetic Method, seeing is believing. ( A shiny gold star, awarded to those who suspect Flat Earth has bible written all over it ) 19th century English writer Samuel Rowbotham gave birth to flat earth – publication of a 16 page pamphlet titled Zetetic Astronomy, spawned a 430 page book called Earth Not a Globe, and street corner hand-out “Inconsistency of Modern Astronomy and Its Opposition to the Scriptures”. In short, our senses and the bible are crucial factors in supporting a flat, immovable Earth – essential truth not to be set aside for science, a system based solely on human conjecture. See link below for expanded Flat Earth chronology –


Flat Earth conspiracy runs deep. Targeting an elaborate hoax orchestrated to replace religion with science.Not limited to NASA (despite allegations NASA employs guardians of the Antarctic ring wall ), flat earthers claim the United Nations flag as evidence of global conspiracy. An illustrative, in your face flip off depicting flat earth enclosed by Antarctic wall.

Allow Flat Earth to alleviate guffaws and protestation. Below – 4 minutes of emphatic video, motivated by “I’m sick and tired of ignorant ice wall questions” frustration. I learnt a lot – shame on fools who believed Earth’s ice ring resembled a stone wall. How could I be so stupid – God didn’t build a fence, obviously the Antarctic ring varies in width and height. Clearly flat earth’s edges are frosty, nothingness beyond is freaking cold. Duh.

10 thoughts on “Flat Earth

  1. Awesome. In the sixties, the FBI managed to contain the communists and other do-badders by releasing secret footage of UFO’s. Now Trump is giving us this science (assuming this is Trump’s work). A feel a lot safer now. For a moment I was worried that we would have to face Mexican walls and export of Muslim aliens. This is so much better.

    • Screw Mexican walls, the wall India built to keep out millions of drowning people from Bangladesh, toss China’s great wall – we can all relax. God tossed us in a playpen surrounded by ice.If we behave ourselves and listen to the teacher, everything will be just fine.

    • Props to the earnest nutter behind the video – if nothing else, give the man a blue ribbon for politely muzzling frustration.It must have taken considerable fortitude to keep his shit together long enough to set us straight.

  2. Pingback: Flat-Earther Plans To Launch Himself In A Homemade Seam Rocket | notestoponder

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