Help, WordPress is Crashing

Rushed home tonight earlier than expected, fired up the laptop before my coat hit the stand. Anxious anticipation of all things WordPress, met with blank, unfamiliar exasperation. Site stats page – blue header, above utter blankness. Clicked on Reader – nothing. Notifications – zippo, nobody home.

Instinctively searched WordPress Help and forums – found similar complaints, and a few “fixes” (without exception, all beyond my pathetic computer knowledge). Not about to uninstall wordpress after backing it up, systematically uninstall plugins until finding one that might be the culprit, or re-name files (all described in language or references making about as much sense as reading Gaelic) I found myself pacing like a caged beast.

Abandoned WordPress, delved into Google with rabid determination. How hard could this be – it worked two days ago, I hadn’t inadvertently changed settings or downloaded a fictional last straw. Who was I kidding – why can’t people who know what they’re talking about remember I’m an idiot? Why was Adobe Flash Player blamed for the fall of western civilization? How hard is it to answer a straight forward question?

Went back to WordPress hoping it was all a bad dream – nope, WordPress was evaporating before my eyes. Blank tease followed blank screen into oblivion. Like a spectator at my own funeral, wanting to scream “here I am, I have so much more to say” – not an ear perking to inaudible splutters.

Exhausted, disillusioned, battling hordes of invasive emotion – a thought tip toed cautiously towards desperation’s siege. Close all programs – restart your computer. Initially cautious little thought appeared useless – it watched me storm away in a huff of blustery resignation. Ever the optimist, one last try before bed. Holy crap – WordPress was back.

Exhilaration is fading – I can’t imagine a restart fixed the dilemma. Consider this a plea – a request for insight from anyone with patience to “dumb down” tech speak and enlighten a hopelessly lost notes.

Notes Turns Two

I almost forgot Ponder’s birthday – Mother’s Day 2012, my daughter sent me an email asking that I log in to a wordpress account. Never having heard of wordpress, knowing only that she had my complete trust, I obliged by clicking on the link and entering our trusty old family code word to pass the gates of ho-hum into “where have you been all my life?”.

I can’t take credit for my first post – it met me at my wordpress gate,  posted by my daughter based on a story I told her a few days earlier. It stoically boasts one “like” and seventy five “views”.

My daughter claimed there was far too much rattling about my head and I needed an outlet. Wading cautiously forward, I had the advantage of exploration – no expectations, preconceived ideas, or notion of grandeur. I wasn’t plotting a path of clicks and views, didn’t contemplate strategies aimed at monetary gain or methodically increase my presence. My “about” page, kept brief, vague and on point – simply a post a day, something to think about, talk about, learn more about. Reluctant to divulge personal information, self consciously I began to write for the first time in thirty years.

Shaky at first, not sure where it would take me, I posted meat and potatoes snippets I found fascinating. Clinging to my knowledge of ancient history – Gobekli Tepe, Derinkuyu, Peri Reis, Hypogeum of Malta, and Mica lined Pyramid of the Sun. Terrified I might be “pegged” a bat shit alien conspirator or crystal fondling numerologist, I tested the waters of space weather wing nut by posting on the Carrington Event, meteor showers, and to cascading groans of my family – solar flare alerts.

Six months later, not a soul outside my family knew about my blog. One night, well into a bottle of wine I found the courage to hit “publish” on something terrifying – a personal story. I held my breath, briefly paralyzed by second thoughts. None the least of which – it wasn’t particularly well written. I’ve left it alone, resisting the urge to fuss and polish the rather childish story because it was the turning point. I relaxed, told friends about my blog and never looked back.

I never know what I’m going to write, don’t apologize for who I am and care little for pointless mud slinging. What astounds and warms the tip of my toes are the remarkable people I’ve met along the way. I consider myself lucky to have found a little rut to run in. People who know me only through wordpress likely know me better than those who have known me for years. This is who I am – I’ve grown immeasurably in two years and can only daydream of where it will take me. Thank you wordpress.


Regret Large Tomahawk Vanity in Leningrad

Tonight I ponder my favorite posts. Impossible to explain why – they just are. “Regret” is not well written, but is the first time I hit “publish” on personal thoughts. My intention was to nudge the reader, as there is a message in it that we can all relate to.

“Worlds Largest Tomahawk” – nothing more than a couple hundred words; reminding me of a perfect day driving across Canada.

“Vanity” hit me on the head one night after a glass or two of wine; extremely pleased with myself for writing such a clever observation.

“Leningrad Symphony” represents a holy crap moment – I knew nothing of the siege of Leningrad; a testament to the human spirit.

As with any proud mother, I could list favorite after favorite – my blog year, close to a first anniversary has taught me volumes about myself, and opened my eyes on the world. A hearty thank you to those who liked or followed me along the way.

Very Inspiring Blogger Nod

Many thanks to Petril41 at Dear Kitty for the Very Inspiring Blogger nomination.

Very Inspiring Blogger Award

This nomination carries some rules and responsibilities. First – thank and link back to the person who nominated you. Second – nominate 15 other bloggers you admire, and notify them of the honour. Last – tell 7 things about yourself.

Seven things about notestoponder….

1. I gave flowers to Queen Elizabeth when I was twelve.

2. I have dried flowers from Queen Elizabeth’s bathroom. (She dropped the puck at a hockey game when I worked backstage at the arena)

3 This is my 248th post.

4. My post ‘Pondering Stephen Harper” has received the most views, with 967.

5. I’m not able to wink or whistle.

6. I can’t turn out the light at night unless I’ve checked space weather.

7. Given the opportunity – nothing would make me happier than to be a storm chaser.

My Nominees….